Tired Mom

Written and illustrated by Kelley Clink

The summer after my second kid turned one, I got shingles. It started with the worst headache of my life, then the tell-tale rash erupted across the right side of my ribcage. I went to urgent care and got a prescription for antivirals. I assumed that would be the end of it.

You’ve probably already guessed that it wasn’t.

For one thing, the headaches continued after the rash subsided. Then my neck and right shoulder started getting kind of…stuck. They’d release with a loud CLUNK. I was tripping constantly. I’d be in the middle of walking normally, and oops, one of my feet just wouldn’t lift. I was also experiencing a fatigue so severe it was akin to being drunk.

I went to my primary care physician, who sent me to a neurologist. An MRI revealed that some of my brain was poking out through the bottom of my skull, but “not enough to cause those kinds of symptoms.”

I went back to my PCP with a list of questions and other possible causes to explore, including a connective tissue disease I’d just heard about that overlapped with a lot of symptoms I’d experienced throughout my life. She shot them all down immediately, one by one, then shrugged and said, “You know, having two young children is a lot of work. It’s normal for moms to be tired. I’m sure you’ll feel better when they’re older.”

Seven years later, I still can’t tell you whether my continuing symptoms are lasting damage from the shingles (maybe), standard complications from the connective tissue disease I was finally diagnosed with (by someone else), or that pesky bit of brain that may actually be poking out further than was first thought (who knows?). What I can tell you is that my kids now brush their own teeth, wipe their own butts, and sleep through the night better than I do, and yet, somehow,

I’m still a very, very tired mom.

This was written and illustrated by Kelley Clink